The Tale of Revenge
by potterride
Summary: Fred and George have always wanted to meet the Marauders, what happens when they do? AU..this is a PARODY.
1. Chapter 1 People of the Great

***Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, J.K Rowling does.***

Chapter One

People of the Great

A cloudless night, the stars shining ever so brightly. The stars shined on the people in the open field, there was more than one person in that field, plotting something.

"That darn witch." Sirius grumbled.

"Shhhh, we can't let anybody hear us." James said.

"James, she tricked us, and left us with _this_." Sirius said pointing to an animal.

"You can't blame her," Remus said nonchalantly.

"Oh, shut up, Moony. She gave us this monkey which is half-"Sirius started. There was a rustling behind them. What came out, were two red-head twins.

"Hello, we are lost, and need help." Fred smiled. " I am Fred Weasley and that George Weasley."

"Yea and we are the Marauders." Peter mumbled, and James elbowed him hard in the ribs.

Fred and George's face lit up like they just met the people who they owe their success to. Wait, they are meeting the people they owe their success to. That should give you a clear image then.

"You're the Marauders?" George asked. Fred had a bright smile on his face.

"The ones and only," Sirius said putting a fake smile on his face.

"You are the people who created the Marauders Map?" Fred asked. James groaned,

"I thought Filch confiscated that from us,"

"We confiscated it back," Fred and George said together.

"These kids might have potential in them," Sirius searched Fred and George's faces. "You know as a Marauder."

The other just gazed at him, like he was the 20th wizard wonder in the world.

"Sorry to break all the tension rising silence here, but what is that creature?" George asked pointing to the monkey. The monkey had sharp fangs, and pointed ears.

"We rather not explain, because it is very embarrassing." Remus said rubbing his neck.

"Let's just tell them," Peter murmured.

"Okay, Peter let's also tell them that we are Animagi." Sirius regretted his words as soon as he said it.

"You guys are Animagi?" George asked squealing with excitement.

_CRACK!_

"Hey everybody, what did I miss?" Regulus (who the Marauders call 'Greg') asked apparating from where ever he was to the field.

"Not much, Greg. Just a mad-monkey who is also half elf." Sirius explained, like Greg was there the whole time. The twins looked at the monkey, ideas flooding into their head. They looked at Greg then at the Marauders, then back at the monkey. No one could pass up a time like this.

"Well, if you all have the time, we will explain to you all about this... monkey- elf."James smiled. The tale began.

**A/N: Hello people of the earth and beyond! This is a great story and there shall be more..I can just leave you with a cliffhanger can i now? The tale shall be amazing and this is not shall..IS a PARODY. If you did not realize that yet. Oooooo I have more ideas that are flooding into my head at this very moment. Some people might say this might ruin my reputation, but i have don't have one to lose. Sigh...anyways...REVIEW! CLICK THE BUTTON AND REVIEW! P.S The last maximum ride book is coming out TOMORROW! AHHH**

**good luck with life!**


	2. Chapter 2 Crazy?

**A/N: This is just too funny! Well, yea if I had a reputation.. it would probably be ruined..like damaged. Yea, I just learned to love this story..finally..even though **

**I wanted to end it..i still do! So give me your input on that Plz! R&R! ANGEL CAME OUT! AHHHH no, no one tell me a thing i just got the book so shut your mouths! Anyways, I am on hyper mode! Happy belated valentine's day! meh..**

**good luck with life...**

Chapter Two

Crazy?

"Peter wanted to go visit his mum since he hasn't see her in a while. Of course, Peter just had to drag Remus, Sirius, and I with him. Peter suffers from short-term memory loss, so he forgot much about his mum. Thus, he forgot we she lived and what she looked like. So, we wandered aimlessly around streets, going where Peter "thought" his mum lived." James flashed an angry look at Peter. Sirius continued it from there,

"We kept on pointing at houses that Peter's mum might of lived in. Out of all the houses which pointed out, Peter insisted she lived in a big, bright yellow house with overgrown flowers and trees. It looked like the sun landed in the middle of nowhere, and thought it would blend in." Sirius glared at Peter, like he was one step away from giving him all broken ribs. So, Remus continued from there,

"Peter went to go ring the doorbell as we followed close behind. This is getting quite predictable isn't it?" Remus asked. The twins looked so confused,

"What's going to happen?" Fred asked nervously. Remus ran his hand through his hair, and groaned,

"You know what, Peter? You tell the stupid story." Peter eyes were fixed at the monkey's shoes- black suede shoes. Then, he started to tell every bit of the story,

"Well, a woman came to the door, she looked old and had skin like a plastic bag. I knew she couldn't be my mum, but before I even started to run away terrified. She took me by the wrists and threw me inside the house. She did the same for the rest of them," Peter pointed to Remus, Sirius, James. "In the house she had a big cauldron and monkey hair next to it.

"I am guessing you aren't making soup?" James asked to the woman. The woman didn't nod, she just stared into space. Anyways, Sirius, you know being all Sirius and all, went to go touch that cauldron. As if on cue, a monkey jumps out of it, and pin Sirius down to the floor. It was quite an amazing fight, with the monkey drooling on Sirius, and James trying whip the monkey with its own tail..." Peter started to blab.

"PETER!" everybody shouted, even the monkey made a sound.

"Oh right, where was I? Right, the monkey soon lost interest with James and Sirius. The monkey lunged right at the woman- who we now thought was a witch. She didn't even flinch as the monkey took one of her eyes out of her socket. Uhhh," Peter shuddered, "Now that is going to be hard to describe, since I think we are all scarred for life." Peter addressed the rest of the Marauders.

"Cool!" Fred, George, and of course Greg shouted in unison.

"Trust me, it was everything but that. We all just stared at the woman's grotesque face which seemed all puffed up, and red as Mars.

"You must take this monkey home," the one-eyed witch said, in a hoarse voice. We all just froze and ran out of the house as fast as we could. Apparently, the monkey just _had _to follow us. When we turned back to give the monkey back to the one-eyed witch, the house was gone. It just disappeared into the plastic-like asthenosphere (a.k.a mantle..basically the Earth). So, now we just apparated to Sirius' favorite place; an empty field." Peter ended the story by glaring at Sirius.

"Did I also mention, that after all this was over, Peter remembered that his mum died?" James asked through his gritted teeth. No one cared to answer though.

"Interesting story," George said in his trying-to-be-_serious_ voice. "How is the monkey prat elf?"

"Peter, you forgot to mention how the witch stole an elf from the North Pole and took some DNA to put in her cauldron. Thus, making the monkey half-elf." James said in his tyring-to be-serious voice. The voices weren't working whatsoever.

"Sirius, wait 'till our mum hears about this!" Greg snickered.

"Greg, did you forget our mum is dead?" Sirius asked in his trying-to-be-sweet voice. Greg's face turned bright red; he forgot his mum was dead.

"Still, wait until anybody hears about this half-elf monkey creation." Greg said

"By the way, why does it have black suede shoes?" Fred asked.

"We never got around into making that theory, we have had our hands tied with the monkey himself!" Remus yelled.

"Calm down, er..Remus," James said biting back the urge to call Remus, Moony.

"You know what you should name it, MON-KEY. Like the Muggle movie, WALL-E." Greg started to laugh, like he said the funniest/stupidest joke. Everybody just stared at him wondering if they should laugh hysterically on the ground like Greg. They also wondered, if he was crazy or not.

Being the Marauders, they just burst out laughing, wiping tears away from their eyes in like seconds. Being the Fred and George, they went to examine the monkey, pranks flooding their mind. They had the same exact thought, with the same exact idea.

"MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" the twins laughed at the exact same time. All laughter stopped immediately, it was like time froze.

The twins were still laughing like mad scientists, even though the Marauders and Greg just met them, they knew what the twins were thinking was not going to be good.


	3. Chapter 3 PlottingOr Not?

**A/N: Yo read this story first..this one..not bittersweet x understand? good. read...stupid ANGEL**

Chapter Three

Plotting the Revenge or Not?

"Maybe we could slip away into the shadows while they are still laughing like evil scientists, and be like secret ninjas who just got freaked out?" Peter asked hopefully, while doing a bad demonstration of a fight move.

Remus shook his head, as if saying "Oh, Peter! Why? WHY?" Yeah, Peter just made Remus ashamed. However, since it was they only plan they had, they decided to go with it, and leaving the monkey with the twins. Just for moral support in case the twins ever needed it.

They started to slip away in the shadows, hoping that Peter will not make any noise and ruin his plan.

"Wait," the Marauders and Greg turned around to the voice of Fred and George Weasley. Their voice sounded feign and possessed. Their arms were pointing towards the Marauders and Greg.

"I think he is pointing to you, Greg." James said frightened, and pushed Greg towards the twins. Greg whimpered, and looked like he was about to break down crying. The ever-so brave, and stoic Regulus Black, was now a scared out of his mind.

"Sirius! Your the older one, HELP!" Greg shouted, and crawled behind Sirius' legs for support. Sirius tried to shake his off his cowardly acting brother, but Greg was just too scared of red-headed twins.

"You can help us..." the twins said again in the same voice. Greg whimpered some more, and so did Peter.

"I think we should go now, James." Sirius said. James nodded, but looked slightly worried about Greg. James was thinking that they might have to go to a trauma hospital to get Greg back to normal.

"Sorry didn't mean to scare you there, we like doing that voice. It our specialty." Fred smiled returning back to un-possessed/never possessed- to- begin with voice.

Greg's face lit up, now he went back to being stoic, brave Greg that we all know and love.

"However, we do have a plan that can help you take revenge out on the witch." George said.

"Oh, and Regulus we need your input on it, since you seem like a conspirator." Fred said putting on a serious face.

"ZOMG, his name is Regulus? I thought he name was Greg," Sirius asked. Greg just slapped himself on the head.

"Seriously, Sirius? I'm your younger brother named Regulus Black." Greg said to Sirius like he was talking 5 year-old. "'Greg' is your nickname for me," Sirius was still looking confused, but Greg just ignored it and moved on.

"So, what's your idea?" Greg asked the twins.

"Well, we thought that you might want to get revenge on the one-eyed witch, since you can't get revenge on Peter." George explained.

"Yea, don't worry though, fate gets revenge on him in the Malfoy Manor." James said. Peter was just staring at them innocently.

"Well, we are very good conspirators too," Remus said.

"Agreed," Sirius said.

"Wait, George, don't you think that we should..." Fred started to say, but ended the rest in a whisper to George.

"Excellent!" George shouted. The Marauders and Greg just stared at them blankly.

"Wand-shake?" Fred asked getting out his wand. George nodded. They both took out their wands, they both tapped the tips of their wand twice. Then, spun away from each other and spun back in a dueling pose. That my friends, is what a Fred and George call a wand-shake.

"Beautiful!" Greg said clapping. "If only I had a brother that would do those kind of things with me." Greg turned to face Sirius, who was shaking his head.

"So, are you with us?" Fred asked all of them.

"Yea, if you tell us the plan," James said. George was just about to explain when the monkey howled,

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPP!" MON-KEY screeched. Everybody put their hands of their ears from the ear-splitting screech.

"MON-KEY, shut up!" Sirius shouted over the screeching. They all took out their wands and pointed it to MON-KEY. But before anyone could do anything, MON-KEY took bananas out of his purse (you saw that right) that he had just seemed to get now, and hurled the bananas at the twins, the Marauders, and Greg.

"BANANA FIGHT!" Greg shouted running away. The Marauders and the twins looked at each other, this wasn't a hard choice.

"RUN!" they all shouted following Greg into the darkness, with only the moonlight as a source of light. MON-KEY seemed confused at first, like he was wondering why didn't they just apparate? Then, MON-KEY took out more bananas and ran after all of them. So, now they have to worry about a crazy half-elf monkey on the loose with about an endless supply of bananas. Plus, the monkey has fangs, and with scared Marauders, the Weasley twins, and Greg does not make a happy picture.

**A/N: Helloo...this chapter didn't turn out so good, I've had writers block all week.. bittersweet x knows what I am talking about. You see this was supposed to be the best week of my life with a good report card, my cousin, and other stuff. But ANGEL the maximum ride book ruined it for me sadly. So yea.**

**good luck with life.**

**HIII. this is bittersweet x writing in potterride's story because my little sister is being annoying SO I've come to vandalize potterride. :) HI. Go read my story 'Survivor.' Then read potterride's other stories. Kay? Kay. BYEEZ :)**


	4. Chapter 4 Logic

Chapter Four

Logic

"Okay, we were just running from a wild half-elf monkey with a purse, and it hurling bananas at us." Greg said breathlessly. The Marauders and the twins finally caught up with them, they felt like they had just ran 10 miles. They heard the sound of MON-KEY screeching nearby, it seemed like they just figured out that monkeys travel fast. They are very smart.

"Why didn't we just apparate?" Fred asked as it suddenly dawned on him.

"Now, I just realized it too. Why didn't we apparate?" Remus asked. Peter and Greg nodded as they looked at Sirius and James.

"Well, um, I don't know how to put this-" James started to say, but got cut off by one MON-KEY's banana hit the side of his head.

"Darn, you, MON-KEY!" James shouted. "Anyways, as I was saying, I am afraid of apparating by _myself_." James stared at the ground, hoping nobody heard it. Well, since they all had ears (George more or less, but since that did not happen yet, they all have ears), they burst out laughing. Even MON-KEY started to chortle, that monkey was getting weirder by the day..er hour. Even Sirius was chuckling, even though he knew it already.

Somehow MON-KEY's laugh turned into a huge scream, that sound like a dying mad scientist. That silenced them for sure.

"Uhhh, speaking of the crazy monkey, what was the plan before?" Peter asked moving away from MON-KEY.

"No one was speaking of the monkey, we were speaking about James." Fred stared at Peter like he was some rat.

"The plan...right..." George said with an evil smile on his face. "Let's huddle up so MON-KEY doesn't hear us." the moved in circle, and the twins spoke to quietly you could hear dust drop.

When they were done, evil smiles spread to each of their faces. However, they were not thinking the same thing. Knowing the Marauders, they were going to change it up somehow. Knowing Greg, he had a plan of his own. Fred and George, though didn't give the whole plan, the left out some crucial details, which will make this plan jazz up. Without even knowing MON-KEY, you would know that he was plotting something. This was going to be EPIC.

**A/N: Hellloooooo! Yes this is another chapter of one of my creations. I giggled after I read the ending of this..oh, I hope you giggle too, or laugh hysterically, but make sure you dont creep anyone out..k? Just laugh plzzzz...laughing is my fave thing to do! Laugh and review...Man, I lovee this story now! YAYYYY...sigh...**

**good luck with life :)**


	5. Chapter 5 The Bet

Chapter Five

The Bet

It was eerily quiet as the Marauders, the twins, and Greg walked down the street with MON-KEY right behind them. It was odd for them to be quiet, even MON-KEY was quiet.

"Guys, do you think we should tell them our plan? Or tell them the details?" Peter asked the Marauders.

"I don't know, Peter, just that bet is killing me. What's bothering me is that they have the same idea as us." Sirius rubbed his neck. "I mean, that plan is perfect, exactly what the bet was."

James looked over his shoulder and saw Greg talking to MON-KEY like it was human. James shook his head, he was happy. The Black brothers weren't happy too often.

"What was the bet, again? I can't remember." Peter looked up at James, Sirius, and Remus.

"Did someone _obliviate_ Peter?" Remus groaned.

"Peter! You just brought up the bet!" James whispered-yelled.

"I just forgot that's all," Peter said innocently.

"Remember before we left that one-eyed witch's house, she made a bet with us." Sirius started.

"Right, and she said in her weird raspy voice," James began,

"If you can create something crazier than this monkey, in exchange, I will give you your own band." James concluded, having an outstanding imitation of the witch.

They all smiled, having a band was their dream, and the perfect imitation of the witch. Of course, it wouldn't be at all like a Muggle band. It would be something new, exciting, making girls swoon. Except James didn't want the girl part, because he all he wanted was Lily, she would be the most perfect girl ever for him. If a mind-reader read James' mind at that moment, that person would be going, 'AWWW.'

"Anyways, Peter, do you get how important this plan is? If you have any ideas please bring them immediately." Sirius said.

"What ideas?" Peter ask, looking lost.

"I swear, if there was a choir for mastered groans, Sirius, Remus, and I would be included in it." James glared at Peter.

"Let's just no answer that," Remus shot an angry look at Peter. He now seemed hurt, too bad, it's their fault for not paying attention.

They walked on, gears turning in their heads, hoping for an idea. They just simply walked- all of them. There feet taking them to carry out their best plan ever. If only they knew what the plan was.

**A/N: Yo, I'm so sorry I haven't put stuff up in a long time. If your bored go read my other stuff that I have. My stories aren't endless :). Anyways, I needed to have a really good and funny week to post this chapter or write one. So yea, courtesy of my BFF being sick, I decided to cheer her up with this chapter. So I dedicate this chapter too my loyal readers and my BFF. Also of course, bittersweet x..kk? You know who you are loyal readers! Meh, I have tests this week..three of them! I need to study..well..smile and laugh today..hoping that you did by reading this :)**

**good luck with life :)**


	6. Chapter 6 Perfection

Chapter Seven

Perfection

"I'm not following you, why is this perfect?" Remus asked.

"Oh, right. Well, while you guys were sleeping, we combined all of your DNA, George's and mine, Greg's DNA, and MON-KEY's DNA. We took advantage of Greg's fantastic potion-making skills, and made some sort of liquid." Fred concluded.

"DNA?" Peter asked.

"Deoxyribonucleic acid," George explained. "It's what makes you, _you_."

"So, we took your drool, hair, and other various things. Greg mixed it up into some ugly looking, odd liquid. All we have to do is say a spell when we get to the witch's house, and you will win the bet." Fred explained further.

"Is this your weird way of implying that all of us put together, that we're crazier than MON-KEY?" Sirius scratched his beard.

"Yes!" Fred and George answered without hesitation.

"Brilliant!" James cried.

"Now do you guys see that they are Marauder material?" Sirius asked his fellow Marauders.

"Yes, Sirius we talked about this! They can't become Marauders because we all die!" James shrieked.

"Okay, okay," Sirius put his hands up defensively. "Don't have to ruin my life for me," 

"So are we good to go on the plan?" Greg asked, who stopped the row between Sirius and James.

The Marauders nodded.

"Oh, I can't wait 'till we have our own band!" Peter squealed.

"Well, Peter I guess you don't have to wait much longer," said Remus. "we're here." He pointed at the house that the Marauders were once in. The big, yellow house with overgrown flowers, and with too tall trees.

"Time to bring out the potion," George said. Behind them MON-KEY started screeching,

"I guess that's our cue to go in, CUE SUSPENSE!" Sirius shouted. The stepped forward to the house.

**A/N: And end scene! Sorry for the cliffhanger and the wait! Forgiveness? Meh, probably not. Anyways, and im very sorry for the short chappie as well, I have no excuse (I do) I will update this story more often, but who doesn't like a good suspense chappie?** **I do, so yea plz R&R! thxxx, ****Oh, yea I'm sorry for the most likely inaccurate information regarding DNA, so if you are a scientist reading this, please do not sue for inaccurate info, thx**** :)**

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	7. Chapter 7 The Overdue Action

Chapter Seven

The Overdue Action

"Hurry up and put the potion together!" George warned Greg who was brewing the potion in the pot.

"Alright I'm done. Mow time to say the magic words. I'm just gonna make up my own...the one everyone knows to be stereotypical. _Alakazam!_" Greg shouted pointing his want as the odd potions.

Out came a unicorn with fangs, a red mane of hair, round glasses, and a black beard.

"Ello, mate," it also spoke in an Australian accent.

"Uh, hello?" George was the first one to talk. The unicorn nodded his head.

"None of us have an Australian accent!" Sirius exclaimed.

"This is so odd," Greg added.

"What should we name it?" Peter asked.

"Not UNI-CORN," Remus mumbled.

"Dang it," Peter snapped his fingers.

"Ohhh, can we name him Orangy?" (ARE-RAN-JEE) Fred asked excitedly.

"Since that's the best name fine." Sirius agreed, along with others.

"Shall we go in?" Greg motioned forward.

"Uh, the door is already opened," James observed pointing at the door.

"C'mon, Orangy, let's go in." George patted his head.

"I know, mate. You're not gonna leave me out here to die." Orangy retorted. "And please get that little monkey away from me!"

"Nah, he's staying with us. Let's go animales." Greg said speaking Spanish at the end.

They stepped inside, only finding the One-Eyed Witch strumming a guitar.

"We have two creatures-" James started to say awkwardly at the same time Fred and George started to throw bananas at the witch.

"I DON'T LIKE CHEESE! STOP THROWING IT!" she gasped.

"Cheese? It's bananas, lady." Fred started to eat one.

"I don't have all day! Let me see the crazy animal." she beckoned.

"Go, Orangy," Sirius pushed the unicorn forward.

"Is this the best you've come up with? Fail. Next!" the witch yelled.

"There's no one behind us." Greg said.

"I meant my monkey. C'mere monkey." as if James knew the witch would reject Orangy and he would never get his band, he had a back-up plan.

"ONE...TWO... THREE! ATTACK HER!" James yelled.

Before, the witch could even react; Remus and Peter started to tie MON-KEY and the witch up in bubble wrap.

"What's wrong with wizards these days?" the witch cried.

"Can we please have our own band?" Sirius asked politely.

"No." the witch said without hesitation.

"Okay, guys let's go. Come on, Orangy." Sirius shrugged.

"Awww, I wanted my own band," Peter whined.

"Yea, yea, and I want the girl of my dreams," James retorted.

"You get that later," Remus said.

"Shushhh, readers don't know that."

"You can't just leave us here!" the witch said. MON-KEY howled in agreement.

"You left us in the middle of nowhere!" James said.

"AGGGG! Can I at least of my eye back?" out of context that sounds really weird.

"No." they all said in unison

"I call shotgun!" Greg raised his hand.

"Greg, all we have is a unicorn," Sirius grinned.

"I still call it!" Greg yelled.

"Let's go out for ice cream," Fred suggested. "In the cliche sunset that's out. And you're not invited, weird witch."

"I always liked sunsets," Orangy said. "They make my hair seem blonde."

"Nah," everyone except Orangy said in unison as they were leaving.

"You just jealous," Orangy gave a flip of his hair-pronouncing 'jealous' as JEEl-OO-US.

"You need to work on your pronunciation," Jame laughed.

"I was a teacher in a former life you know," Orangy replied. That set them off on a whole new wave of laughter.

Alas, time passed and many of the characters in the story do not have a happy ending. The Marauders as we know all die; James died because of the _stupid_ Peter Pettigrew, Sirius died because of Bellatrix, Peter died in the Malfoy Manor, Remus died as a hero on the battlefield. Regulus died by attempting to destroy the necklace/Horcrux. Fred died -weep- by the explosion. George survived with only one ear throughout his life. Now your all wondering what happened to the witch and MON-KEY...well, let me put to you this way, they were trapped in bubble wrap, the witch has magical powers, and MON-KEY is just dangerous...AND THEY WERE NEVER SEEN AGAIN (disclaim that from my friend.). Orangy? He's in hiding, the last detail I can give is that, he became a scientist and changed is his names to Timothy E. Augustan Silva. Okay, two details. Was everyone well at the end? No. Somehow life went on; still advancing, still doing and living up to the legacy of People of the Great.

_"It's kind of fun to do the impossible." _~Walt Disney

_"Really great people make you feel that you, too, can become great." ~_Mark Twain

**A/N: Yo. I'm soooo sorry for not writing this as often as i should be. Stupid finals. Hey at least I finished them today..can i get a WHOOP WHOOP? no? sigh. Well, bittersweet this is what craziness i hate hiding for u. MWHAHAHAHAHAAHA this is as incoherent I can get right now because i just had a spider attack...yea it was big and i ran away screaming in terror...- shivers - well...hope u had fun throughout this story as i wrote it..pardon ny writers block por favor. Smile and laugh always :)**

**good luck with life live it. dream it. love it.**

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